Can You Beat Far Cry 3 With Only A Machete?


Far Cry 3 was widely regarded as one of the best games of 2012 thanks to its interesting characters, an world packed full of details to uncover about Rook Island’s history, and multiple ways to approach any combat situation with it’s wide variety of weapons. But what if you wanted to avoid almost every weapon in the game? Can You Beat Far Cry 3 With Only A Machete?

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Check out some of my other videos if you enjoyed this one:
Can You Beat Bioshock With Only A Wrench?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JY4GfoqI2-0
Can You Beat Fallout 4 Without A Pip-Boy?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0GamZYQwvA
Can You Beat Skyrim With Only A Fork?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBVBrUXGpWk
Can You Beat Fallout 3 as a Baby?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6HLHqINNuM8
Can You Beat Skyrim By Only Using Shouts?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TzSmz3BokE
Can You Beat Fallout 4 With Only A Commie Whacker?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEYakRU58_c
Can You Beat Honest Hearts Without Taking Any Damage?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JMrlNpx319A

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Can You Beat Far Cry 3 With Only A Machete? (in text form)

The game begins with all these rascals behaving as typical college aged children. Shots, turtles, general douchbaggery, you tell by their hats that they’re just asking to be kidnapped by pirates and sold into a life of slavery and possible torture. Oh, well this is a nice surprise. Being tied up and trapped in what may or may not be a bamboo box would be fun if it I weren’t trapped in there two.

While Grant and I make our escape, allow me to explain a little bit about this run. I said “Machete” in the title because you start with the machete as your melee weapon, but you can also get a knife which I eventually upgraded to. What can’t I use to [bonk] people and animals? Pretty much everything. No firearms, no flamethrowers, no grenades, no molotov cocktails, no bow and arrow, no running people over, no throwing knives, no anything else. I can only use the knife or machete I have equipped in the melee weapon slot.

Because I’m trash at sneaking, it took several attempts to half-way escape. Grant, the typical older brother who knows how to do combat [bonk] and promises to keep me safe, got shot in the neck, I sat back, laughed, didn’t attempt to hold him, ran into the jungle and eventually escaped into the water where I blacked out, had a nightmare about a game logo, and woke up in a bed.

Dennis gave me a tattoo without my permission, seemed like a weird thing for someone to do, he gave me a machete, held my hand, showed me around the village, and sent me off to buy a gun. Far Cry 3 is unfortunately more like Bioshock Infinite and less of a Bioshock because you don’t have the option of wielding the machete in your hand as your main weapon. I can’t remove the pistol, but I can sure as hell waste all of the ammo I bought with Dennis’s money.

My island adventure begins now. With my empty handgun and machete dangling dangerously at my side, I approached the first radio tower, discovered that you have to hold Square for like a year to loot containers, got bit by a snake, looked down, and successfully de-activated the towers radio broadcast.

After I showed Denise my map, I was rewarded with 2 guns that are less than worthless to me, and was instructed to go skin some wildlife. Apparently [bonk]ing piglet’s entire family is enough to master the jungle. On the way to the farm, I looted an abandoned shack. Looting containers is something I don’t do much of in this play trough because there’s not much to find that’s worth looking for. Money is only useful for buying medical supplies and occasionally body armor. Normally you’d spend it on weapons and ammo, but that is irrelevant in this run.

At the farm, I [bonk]ed a few pigs, boars to be more precise, and conquered the PTSD I’ve had for about 6 minutes by going back into the water to find the blue plant. I returned to Dennis and used my new found nature trash to create 2 Medical Syringes, upgraded my sack to allow it to contain 32 items, and learned the stab in the back s[bonk].

I got in the truck and noticed that the camera really zoomed in for some reason. You field of view freaks may dislike this part. It was here that I got my first taste of real combat. There are pirate booties just asking to be plundered.